Recently we had the opportunity to meet Rajesh Ramani, the spiritual teacher and life skills trainer at Kamalaya Koh Samui, a Wellness Sanctuary and Holistic Spa resort that offers life enriching healthy holidays.
We specifically chatted with him on how to reduce stress in everyday lives. The clarity and simplicity in his thinking left us inspired to take sustainable baby steps towards a forgiving and accepting state of mind.
Stress – our obsession with it continues
Rajesh classifies stress in three types : (1) the general or environmental stress like entering a crowded MTR station or an uncomfortably cold room or being stuck in traffic jam (2) Crisis relates stress like a fire or burglary or an event that poses threat to life (3) Self created stress that comes from our views and where reality doesn’t match with our expectations
The ever elusive need of achieving balance
An imbalance is created when we are driven by fear instead of positive energy. A drive coming from positive place will be fulfilled when the target is achieved but a drive coming from negative place will never be completed as it is about an abyss in oneself which can never be fulfilled and not about fulfilment.
We can address this by being aware of our emotions first. Second step is non violence and practicing compassion. We should not punish ourselves for our fears or thoughts. Finally, encouraging ourselves for small things, praising ourselves and acknowledging our strengths and blessings will take us towards greater balance.
How do we get out of the habit of beating ourselves up?
We can’t get rid of the feeling of inadequacy or of not doing / being enough. But what we can do is recognise the feeling, not condemn ourselves for it and start appreciating ourselves in other areas of life. We should start by creating a habit of appreciation or acknowledgement of our successes, others love for us and good things in our life. At the same time, start acknowledging our dialogue of inadequacy in our thought patterns.
These deeply affected emotions could be coming from some experiences in our childhood, so we can’t get rid of them in one go but we could weaken them by not indulging in them. And we could weaken them by projecting the other side, the positive side. So as we start acknowledging these feelings of inadequacy and on the other hand, start acknowledging how good life is and how successful we are, we end up weakening the feeling of inadequacy.
Want to know more about wellness & treatments in India? Check out, 10 Best Wellness/Ayurveda Spas in India
Simple tips to incorporate in our daily lives :
- Pay more attention to lesser number of experiences as only by attention, there is fulfilment. Otherwise, it is just an item off the checklist
- Start by being aware of your breath, pay attention to your body, do walking meditation to get started in meditation journey
- Be aware of your moods, acknowledge the negative emotions and recognise all the happy moments
- Take praise whenever available
- And my favourite – Don’t beat the actual you to become the ideal you
Rajesh is a resident spiritual teacher at Kamalaya, a wellness retreat which slows you down with its’ good food, programs, nature and restricted wifi, making it possible for you to reflect and incorporate small but significant changes in your life for good.
You can read more about Rajesh Ramani here or watch his (under 5 minutes ) Youtube video on emotional health here –